Non-Profit Leader? Stop Overthinking Everything (Hanu i Waho)

Stop Overthinking- Jay Shetty: LISTEN HERE

As non-profit leaders we all overthink every move constantly. We know that the work we do affects the greater good. That is a heavy kuleana (responsibility) to carry.

I personally tend to overthink the negative at times; the back handed compliments, the remarks about starting a business (and non-profit none the less) in Maui while “surviving” as a single mom.

Today, while listening to Jay Shettyʻs podcast about Overthinking, he shared some wisdom I needed to hear:

“We talk to ourselves like someone we donʻt believe in. . . you would never talk to your friend like that.”

This was the slap in the (energetic) face I needed to reassess my language toward myself. We tend to be our own worst critics when we need to be our biggest cheerleaders. We canʻt shame ourselves- “it wont change (us), compassion will”.

Jay continued to share how “our brain is wired to focus on our mistakes”, how we OVER focus on the negative comments.

We must train ourselves to stop over analyzing as it will block us and hold us back from our full potential.

A personal example:

When starting this non-profit and leaning into a call from my Kūpuna, I received support... but also a lot of back handed compliments. There were times when I sat in my new apartment in Maui and sobbed, because I started to doubt my calling and my abilities. I let myself overthink, dwell, and fester on negative words over the positive words I was also receiving. What I learned to do was to ground myself in my strength. I wrote down and said out loud, who I knew myself to be. 

I had an honest review of myself. I acknowledged the areas that continuously needed to grow, but, just as importantly, I actively spoke into the good I knew to be true. This practice helped me hone into what I knew I offered—a unique gift that could support the lāhui (community/nation) in a way few others could not.

Comparison is a silent killer

Know that our individuality and unique differences can all affect the world in a positive way. Hold space for you to grow but be steadfast in your grace with yourself and learn to Hanu i Waho (exhale) the negative that doesnʻt serve your greater purpose. 

My Take Away: Stop shaming, start cheering, and exhale (Hanu i waho) the noise.